♠♠Oh God, you are my God! And I will ever praise you…. ♠♠The music plays in my background and I am forced to listen and hear what God is saying.
"How long, O Lord? Will you forget me forever? How long will you hide your face from me?"
"How long must I make decisions alone, with sorrow in my heart day after day? How long will my enemy triumph over me?"
"Look at me! Answer me, O Lord my God! Light up my eyes, or else I will die."
"And my enemy will say, “I have overpowered him.” My opponents will rejoice because I have been shaken."
"But I trust your mercy. My heart finds joy in your salvation."
"I will sing to the Lord because he has been good to me."
Yes, it’s been one of those mornings when it doesn’t come easy. Tears flows as life stares you in the face and you look at things that just aren’t as you planned. Things that aren’t what you wanted for your life.
Things that are out of your control. Others have made choices that effected you. You made choices you wish you could undo.
Sometimes you just want to be able to flip a switch and turn things around to the way you want them to be. But it isn’t that easy. There is nothing to do but to trust there is a greater plan than you can see right now.
Therefore, I choose to trust! Not because I feel like it or even barely want to. I know it is the source of my peace, my existence.
Lord, what do you want me to learn in this season? Teach me your ways and may your name be glorified.
Father, I want to be a vessel in your hands. Please mold me, shape me, and create in me what you want to see and want me to be.
As I sit here and ponder all these things allowing the tears to wash away the pain my eyes are drawn to a book called “Opening the Door to Your God-Sized Dream”. I open the book and the Introduction touches my heart greatly.
God-sized dream= a desire in your heart for more of what God has for you. When you open the door of your heart to a God sized dream, you also open it weighed her to the giver of them. That’s what matters most of all. If you long for intimacy with Jesus, joy in your life, purpose in your days, then put your hand on the door doorknob and get ready to turn it. Close your eyes for a moment. Listen not with your ears but with the deepest part of you. Tap tap.
It’s there. A God-sized dream waiting not for the perfect time but for this one -waiting for this moment. Right here. Right now. ~Holly Gerth